Do you ever write a message in a card or send a text and mean the complete opposite of what you’ve written? When you wish someone lots of happiness but actually want to say ‘I want you to be as miserable as you’ve made me feel’. I’ve done this a few times over the past few weeks, just call me Little Miss Passive Aggressive.

What’s that saying, “Play with fire and you’ll get burnt” I certainly feel scolded right now, completely my fault, actually no, not completely my fault; I played the game, I lost and it sucks. What sucks even more are butterflies I can’t seem to kill off in my tummy that make me feel sick far more often than I’d like to even admit to. The game is over butterflies, so take your giddy stomach churning feelings and bugger off!

So I’ve completely written off April, I don’t even think the Easter bunny delivering chocolate eggs will cheer me up or get me out off this awful mood. I have been hitting the gym lots hoping that the endorphins will work their magic although they don’t appear to have had much effect as yet but it is only the 14th of the month. I’m annoyed with myself for falling of the gym waggon last Summer and for my poor effort at the start of the year (granted I had a poxy cold) I was really hoping to ‘love me’ in 2017 but almost a third of the year down and I’m nowhere close. Hence I’m now desperately trying to get my revenge body by becoming a bit of a gym bunny again – I was waiting outside this morning for the gym to open, aiming to make Good Friday a Great Friday. I ran (I’m not runner though, think Phoebe Friends), then I went on the bike (think Bridget Jones) followed by a visit to some of the arm weight machines (back boobs & bingo wings – Done)

Since my last post my Sister treated our Mum (and me) to the most delicious meal at John Campbell’s The Woodspeen (www.thewoodspeen.com) for Mother’s Day. I had the Scallops with pigs cheeks to start followed by Fillet of beef and then it would appear our waiter had me sussed and knew before taking our desert order that I would choose the ‘Pina Colada’ Coconut parfait, macadamia crumble and pineapple & lemongrass sorbet (just listing the food is making my mouth salivate!) We went to The Woodspeen on the Saturday evening so on the Sunday, Mother’s Day aka Betty’s Day we laid on a champagne afternoon tea (I successfully made scones for the first time) It was a weekend full of eating and drinking, which is another reason why I need to up my game at the gym (plus colleagues appear to be sabotaging my weight loss by baking flipping cakes that I can’t refuse sampling!)

Spring sprung last weekend (although it appears to have vanished for the time being) and it was lovely to wear one of my summer dresses and get my lily white legs out in the sun (honestly my legs are like Casper the Ghost – when people sunbathe next to me they get the best tan because I reflect the sun!) I spent the weekend in my sisters back garden topping up my freckles, watching the planes fly overhead wondering where they were jetting off to wishing I was on board. My holiday is about 8 weeks away, I can’t wait! I’m going back to Barcelona, so I’ll be testing my Spanish skills; Me llamo Laura, mi número es cero siete nueve cinco……..taking in the stunning sights, dipping my toes in the Balearic Sea and hitting the shops! I love shopping and shopping in Barcelona is fab, with Spanish brands like Zara and Mango on almost every street the experience seems far more stress free than here. Since losing some weight I enjoy shopping even more as I can find clothes that fit me in the majority of outlets, it also gives me the opportunity to try different styles. I’ve also been trying different make-up and changing my look a little there too. One of my besties sells Younique make-up products (www.youniqueproducts.com/mrsbeckythompson/products/landing) so my current go to eye shadows are from the Younique Addiction palette No3, I use ‘Smitten’ as my base, topped with ‘Flippant’ and ‘Cheeky’ to create a subtle yet sassy smokey look.   The 3D Fiber Lashes+ mascara is amazing too (although I do have to be a little careful if I’m wearing my contact lenses) The lip exfoliator is brilliant for a silky smooth kissable pout and my sister swears by the Behold setting powder.

I’ve had quite a few G&Ts over the past month, my hairdresser said that perhaps that’s why I’m in such a mopey mood as it can make you depressed!?! Nope I think gin is my saviour and I’d be far more miserable without it, so thank goodness I received my second gin delivery of the year from Craft Gin Club.

So I’ve made it through half of April as a Mardy Moany Mizzog, only another 16 days to go! My aim is to have as many dates with good old gym as possible in the hope that I can improve my mood (I think the chances of that happening are slim to none, but the hope is there)

I hope you all have amazing Easter breaks.

L x